CELEBRITY SINGLES AUCTION: THE ACTUAL POST

[capitalm]

Who: Anybody either letting themselves be auctioned or interested in bidding in the CELEBRITY SINGLES AUCTION
Where: LA city hall
When: NOW ! (Afternoon on February 5th!)
What: CELEBRITY SINGLES AUCTION (FOR CHARITY)
Warnings: Nothing yet!

The hall where the auction is due to take place is all decked out in pink, white and red Valentine's decorations – hearts everywhere, the odd glittery cupid. Probably someone is selling appropriately decorated cupcakes. At the far end is the stage, where each CELEBRITY SINGLE in turn will have their hand in DATE auctioned off to the highest bidder.

SO HERE'S HOW THIS IS GOING TO WORK:

- Tag in with your character/NPC if they're offering themselves up in the name of DATE CHARITY. Include a little bit about what kind of public image they have, especially if they're an NPC.
- If you have a character or NPC who wants to bid on other character/s, reply to them with your character's bid – just the amount of their bid is fine, it doesn't have to be a Full Actual Tag or anything!
- If your character has been definitively outbid, though, make sure you reply to say so, rather than leaving the other bidders hanging.
- Be realistic about how much money your character has to spend on this kind of thing! This is for charity so generous donations are appreciated, of course, but not everybody is a millionaire.

The starting bid for all CELEBRITY DATES is $50.

Remember that characters who have volunteered to be auctioned as superheroes are advised do so in costume to avoid compromising their secret identities!

If you didn't already establish an NPC on the planning post for this event but you just had an idea for one that you really want to use, go ahead and do it, we do not mind.

Comments

MINGLING

[capitalm]

For general interactions not involving the actual bidding. Buy a cupcake. Express your doubts about having signed up for this. Hide under a table.

[hugling]

Teddy is having serious misgivings regarding letting Milly talk him into this. For one thing, he's not even that famous. Sure, he's been in the newspaper a couple times and he had a 30 second interview in a local news TV spot (Unregistered Heroes: the Villains of Vigilantism?), but he certainly isn't on the level of most of the other heroes here. For another thing, dates aren't really his area of expertise. Like, at all.

Still, he looks his best because Teddy always looks his best. Skin a pleasant shade of green, hair and clothing immaculate, teeth perfectly white, eyes almost unnaturally blue. He doesn't exactly seem thrilled to be here, but Teddy can socialize with the best of them, and he returns smiles and sips his non-alcoholic cocktail with at least a shred of grace.

[chapterfiveversenine]

Unclassified alien species are certainly a priority in Legion's book. Their platform has had maintenance, shined clean of the pings and energy scoring that usually accompany hero work, and for the most part they haven't moved at all, but ultimately the consensus has decided that engaging with others is the entire point of this exercise.

"Hello," they say. "You are the hero Hulkling?"

[hugling]

"Yeah, that's me. Legion, right?" Of course he knows who Legion is, but just dispensing with introductions seems rude.

"It's nice to meet you. This auction is pretty intense, huh? I didn't realize people would be bidding so much money."

[chapterfiveversenine]

"It is two-point-five times projected prices," Legion affirms. "It is unlikely that any of these ventures will lead to a long-term relationship or sexual gratification. We do not understand."

[hugling]

"Yeah, I don't think that's really the point here. More like, a chance to spend a lot of money to hang out with your favorite public figures. For fans, and stuff."

He stirs his virgin bloody Mary with its celery stick. "What about you? Are you signed up for the auction?"

[chapterfiveversenine]

"Yes. Various agents expressed mixed opinions, but all agreed that organics would find it amusing."

They pause. "We are not sure why."

[hugling]

"Um. People like to be in proximity to famous people? And also people they admire, but especially people other people admire."

One of the saving graces of coming to Earth as a baby is not having to learn this stuff off of Wikipedia.

[chapterfiveversenine]

Legion tilts their head. "Do they believe that contact with those of high status will earn them greater social standing? This is a common trope in local media."

[hugling]

Teddy nods, sipping his drink. "Yeah, something like that. Bragging rights, and stuff. I mean, not as much in LA because there are celebrities everywhere, so you have the whole thing of casually mentioning that you saw Brad Pitt in your local Starbucks like it's no big deal, you see Brad Pitt all the time, or whatever."

Okay, this is getting way too cynical. "So, uh, did your CONDOR friends get you to volunteer?"

[chapterfiveversenine]

Instead of responding, Legion plays an audio file.

"Dude, come on, it'd be hilarious!"

"Agent Canton, with all due respect-"

"By which you mean no-"

"- I don't think it's a good idea to put someone with Legion's...attitudes in a situation like this."

Legion's own voice cuts in: "You may describe our lack of social skill however you wish, Agent Li. We have no objections to being entered in this event."

"See, Legion agrees with me! It's a charity event! It's not like it's not for a good cause."

"Similar attitudes were expressed by several other agents," Legion states, ending the recording.

[hugling]

"Ah. Yeah. That actually sounds weirdly like what Starbreaker said to me when this was announced."

Never listen to Milly.

"Do you get to go to a lot of fancy things like this?" Teddy can't imagine that being an alien robot superhero affords itself a lot of cocktail party dress code opportunities.

Re: MINGLING

[sick_heartbeats]

Dirk wanders around, out of costume, trying to find a good conversation to eavesdrop on. Anything to keep him from having to watch Jake up there. Why did he come here at all? Oh, right, he can't ever let anything go and likes to make everyone suffer, especially himself, because he's a huge asshole. Jake probably didn't even forget about their totally platonic romcom marathon bro date. He probably just wanted an excuse to not spend time with Dirk, but he was too nice to say it because he's a decent guy instead of an obnoxious shithead 110% of the time.

At least the cupcakes taste good.

Re: MINGLING

[thisisntagame]

While Tron had turned down participating in the auction, he had at least taken the time to drop by the event for a short while. He didn't like the idea that so many known members of the superhero community were present and was convinced of an impending crime spree, so he was mostly just there to be visibly supporting the event and talk to some of the more notable attendees before heading off on patrol.

He was there in full costume, ready to head out as soon as possible, and was currently wandering the room to make sure he had spoken to the requisite parties.

Re: MINGLING

[sick_heartbeats]

Dirk's focus switches to the interface on his glasses as AR pesters him. Isn't that Lightline?

Their dino-slaying bro? It doesn't take Dirk long to spot him in the crowd. That's a pretty conspicuous uniform. Maybe a conversation with someone he knows will pull him out of his shitty mood? It's not like he has anything else to do, so Dirk heads towards Lightline.

Re: MINGLING

[thisisntagame]

Tron was standing to the side of a group of councilmen, waiting for them to finish up their conversation before greeting them. He noticed the kid moving toward him. He looked vaguely familiar, but Tron couldn't place it. He figured he must be a fan.

[sick_heartbeats]

Dirk is completely oblivious to any conversations that are or are about to be taking place. He walks straight up to Lightline, confident that he will be recognized despite not being in costume. It's a shitty disguise no matter what Jake says. "Hey."

[thisisntagame]

"Good afternoon."

Tron answered on instinct, turning away from the other group and give the kid his full attention. At which point he recognized the shades.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but you go by Timeaus correct?"

[sick_heartbeats]

"Yeah, that's me. Don't let anyone hear you say that though." Shitty disguise or not, Jake would be pretty pissed if anyone found them out. "So what are you doing here? You're not up for auction I guess? Doing any bidding? Here for the free food?" Those were appropriate questions, right?

[thisisntagame]

"I came primarily to speak with some of the other attendees, though I have considered bidding on some of the heroes. It's not exactly common for you vigilantes to step forward."

He gestured toward the stage, where a number of teen heroes were waiting awkwardly.

"I'm assuming you turned down the opportunity to participate in this event as well."

[sick_heartbeats]

"Yeah, not really my thing." Dirk looks over at the stage, trying to seem aloof, but he ends up glaring at it. "I'd probably just end up scaring my date off and they'd want a refund. Even though asking for a refund from charity is a shitty thing to do. I'm sure they'd make an exception. The whole thing would be a waste of everyone's time." He stops talking abruptly, realizing how angry his voice was getting.

[thisisntagame]

He noticed the kid getting flustered, but mostly pegged it on the understandably uncomfortable situation.
"I'm sure it wouldn't be that bad. You couldn't do any worse than some of the Trailblazers up there, trust me."

He glanced over the stage, the first time tonight he had given the group of heroes his full attention.
"Are you familiar with any of the other heroes?"

[sick_heartbeats]

"Trust me. I could. I wouldn't even have to try."

He looks away from the stage. "Yeah, the dork in the skeleton getup is my best bro. I guess you know a lot of people here?"

[thisisntagame]

"A fair number, though not as many as you might think. I usually leave that job to the Alpha Force staff, rather than myself."

"Your friend, what's his name?"

clearly not enough silly npcs around

[nothinbut_therain]

Candace Lovelace, who is definitely not Kara Thrace but does sort of look like her from behind, stands near the bar. Former CIA operative and (very briefly an) actress, she’s the host of the hit reality series Who Wants to Marry a Supervillain? and its sister show Trading Lairs. Her company’s gone under some fire recently for “associating with known criminals” and “harboring fugitives,” whatever. A little boozing and schmoozing at a charity event can’t hurt, and it’s a good way to scope out potential contestants.

Candace is here to look good and chew bubblegum. Unfortunately for everyone, she’s never out of bubblegum.