no one mourns the wicked

[thanksoptimus]

Who: Optimus Prime and AUTOBOTS
Where: The Autobot campground.
When: The evening/night after the dance off.
What: Orion Pax has been restored to his past and future self. Optimus Prime is NOT HAPPY. Also, very very tired.
Warnings: Injuries, intense robot ass devastation. Angry dad. Angry mom.

Optimus Prime, unlike Orion Pax, leaves no time for argument or complaint. After he's finished dealing with Megatron, he orders the Autobots to roll out, provided assistance to injured comrades where necessary. He takes no assistance for himself.

Which is stupid, because after days of starvation and torture and minus the burst of power from the Matrix he was utilizing just before, he is extremely fucked up. It's less obvious that he's on his last legs than it might be with some bots, but he is very injured and trying hard to pretend that he isn't. He drives back to base by his own means, and doesn't speak but to give the occasional order until they are there.

He wants everyone safe and tended to and organized, and he needs to have a talk with just about everyone on the team, and besides that he needs to catch up with everything he hadn't been paying attention to as Orion Pax...he doesn't see how he could possibly take a rest quite yet, there is too much stuff to do, and if he made it this far he can make it a little bit father.

More than tired, though, he is angry. He's angry at Megatron, angry at some of his team, and angry at himself. He doesn't pause to talk to anyone once they get back to camp, and immediately starts to ineffectually try to organize things with as few words as possible.

[Feel free to tag in as someone at any point in this, including later in the night or the next day. He will probably pass out in the medibay within the hour, though. Either that or Ratchet will get him.]

Comments

[starscheme]

He only halfway turns back around, a warning growl underscoring his words: "In that case, why bother bringing it up at all?" The emotions he is broadcasting are marked by the same uncertainty and defensive aggression he displayed back during all of the emotionally charged discussions they had when they- or he and Orion Pax, anyway- were held captive by the rogue AI.

[thanksoptimus]

Orion Pax probably would have been concerned about that. He would have seen the vulnerability in someone so ashamed and unfamiliar with their own emotions, that they react to something like this with compensation and aggression. He would have tried to do something about it, even at risk to himself.

Optimus realizes that the bot he had become would not. Not for someone like Starscream, not like this. Not after so much. Not when he just...

The years of war bear down on him with a weight he has never truly felt. To see and feel yourself so divided...more and more, he wishes that he had not. The psychological ramification of this feel more and more damning by the moment.

"Because I still remember. I remember thinking of you in a different light, even if my optics see different now."

[starscheme]

Maybe that had been what was slowly endearing him to Orion Pax, even if at the time he found the bot's earnestness in that regard to be tiring and vexing.

He turns to face Optimus fully again, crick in his wing forgotten for now. "Let me ask you something, if you are so interested in baring your emotions," he deflects. "Why do you always speak as if you and he are two entirely different people? His experiences inform your own, do they not?"

[thanksoptimus]

"I don't," he says, though he's been confused on that point so far, and sometimes he goes back and forth. Much of the time he will refer to his time without the Matrix as himself, only as if he was in some altered mind state. But sometimes, with these gaps in perception, it feels as if there are experience that are incompatible. Experiences that Orion could have and feel that he no longer can as who he is now.

Like his innocent love for Arcee. His reckless trust in Starscream. His genuine heartbreak over Megatron.

"However...I was capable of many things then, that I am not now. You just spoke of how you could not afford friendship, as a high ranking Decepticon. I have similarly made sacrifices...and in many ways it seems as if they have irreparably changed who I am."

[starscheme]

"You certainly don't talk about it as if you don't," he says flatly. "Still, it's rather ironic that your personal growth has come at the cost of losing certain capabilities. It seems inverse to basic logic."

It's an observation, and nothing more. No hidden implications, no sage advice. Nothing.

The Decepticon grunts and turns to pace to the back of his cell, too vexed by this line of thinking to pursue it any further. It's far easier to keep the two OPs separate in his own mind, and categorize Optimus as the enemy. Doubly ironically, this is also inverse to his own opinions on the matter when he'd first discovered Orion in the desert all those months ago. Funny how this shit works.

[thanksoptimus]

Optimus crosses his arms over his chest, watching Starscream through the containment field with dull blue optics.

"Would you not consider the lack of ability to form meaningful bonds a loss, Starscream?"

~tsun tsun~

[starscheme]

God dammit Optimus stop asking him hard questions.

"Not in the recent past, no," he says with forced mockery, settling against the back wall. It's a deliberately vague answer, and one that he has neither the wish nor the information necessary to clarify upon.

After a pause he tilts his head, glares, and adds something far more sincere, though it's stilted in a way that indicates that he's very unaccustomed to expressing true gratitude: "...Thank you for removing that clamp. I would not have trusted any of your officers to do the same, much less expected you to agree to it." His wings flick up at attention as if to further demonstrate his thanks.

gay tbh

[thanksoptimus]

Optimus doesn't know how to feel about this either, but it is at least a far less blatantly tsundere reaction. Instead, his optics just linger on Starscream for a few moments, judging his sincerity. It doesn't seem the same as his obvious attempts at sychophancy.

"There is no need for further pain to result from all of this," he says tiredly, and turns to leave. That is quite enough of this for now. "Goodbye, Starscream."

He is so out of here.